03-Nov / 0 COMMENTS

“I can sleep when I’m dead.”

“Sleep is over rated.”

And other such things I uttered when I was younger, busy raising three little ones at three different schools at some points, my work outside the home in full swing with regular intervals of out of town travel. Life seemed one continuous “GO!” emblazoned in enormous neon lighting.

 

All the while failing to connect the lack of rest to how my lower back was aching, with irritability and mood swings, and lack of mindfulness in my living.  I attributed the lower back pain to my running and exercising four to five times a week, which I believed I needed to maintain good health and regulate my mood.  Looking back, my post-run-feel-good lasted only until someone said or did something that tested my patience, usually my husband, bless his heart.  And even if the difficult moment was resolved with some level of reason and civility, I’d find myself with the residue of upset or resentment. And I kept this pattern for a very long time. I can still hear my younger self declaring with smug pride, “I just push through and get it done,” when friends would ask me how I managed to do all that I seemed to be doing.  While the silent voice inside screamed, “I DON’T KNOW BUT SOMEONE or SOMETHING IS GETTING SHORTCHANGED!”  

 

I realize that it doesn’t have to be this way…  What was missing during that period of time in my life was the practice of carving out some time each day, each week to strengthen the inner life, to nourish the soul, and honor the holy vessel that is the body given to me by the creator God.  Down time I’d allowed myself back then meant mindlessly staring at TV before turning out the light, frequently not until after midnight when the late night talk shows ended. Or it could have been reading a novel that engrossed me until way late into the night.

 

To be sure, there are no lessons on how to rest on the curriculum for the modern world. There may be some who had the good fortune to be around elders in the family who modeled living a life balanced with work, play and rest. Most, I assert, have not.  Rather, were taught at an early age the importance of finding purpose in life and to pursue a life of working and producing and doing something! And Lord help you if you’re idle; idle hands, the playground for devil, a familiar adage goes. Full disclosure, no I’m not much better even now at slowing down to rest.  I think it requires intentioned practice to discipline myself in the art of resting after a lifetime of operating under the notion that if I’m not doing something, I’m being lazy. It really takes practice and I am practicing; I am a beginner in this.  In the mean time, I’m also getting on the soap box to encourage everyone I know to Rest, Rest and get Rest!

 

There’s a brief look of bewilderment followed by sheepish smile on the faces of those to whom I ask, “could you allow yourself ten minutes of just sitting down and not doing anything?” Or when I ask, “Would it be possible for you to turn in an hour earlier to sleep tonight?” And the more impossible seeming request, “Could you unplug tonight from your i-Anything for an hour before you turn in?” The look is as if they just heard the craziest thing ever and also as if they already know the benefit of doing that and they cannot fathom allowing that for themselves.  It’s also a look of, “Oh my goodness, what if I come to enjoy that?!” I know. Imagine such a possibility? Enjoy resting? Going to sleep before midnight? It may even sound almost un-American to some people. So give it a go, friends. Yes, right now. Hit the button to close the screen. Inhale deeply through your belly. Exhale all that you’ve been holding in. Relax our shoulders and soften your gaze. Keep breathing deeply and breathe out. Feel the heaviness of your eyelids and let it gently close. Allow yourself a few minutes of non-doing and just be.

 

Even God rested after he created our world.  One full day, no less.